Hawaiian Poi Dog Breed

The Hawaiian Poi Dog was a companion dog that was kept for warmth while sleeping and then for food when needed; these dogs served no other purpose. The breed died out in the early 19th century. If these dogs existed today, it is difficult to know if the cultural heritage of eating them would remain in practice despite the otherwise taboo custom.

If, however, they were alive today, you might not find them desirable:

PROS

• Low barkers
• Easy to catch
• Great bed-warmers
• Apparently good to eat
• Zero exercise requirements

CONS

• Morbidly obese
• Extremely lazy
• Lived with swine
• Allegedly very ugly
• Very difficult to train
• Large, flat, weak-chinned heads
• Believed to have been rather stupid
• Degenerative bone loss from very poor, paste-based vegetarian diet

The Hawaiian Poi Dog was a fat, lazy, and boorish breed that was apparently not attractive by modern standards. They may have been more a target of kids teasing them before being killed and served as meals, and they may have been too simple to train — let alone escape the fruit and stones thrown at them for fun. As these meals on "wheels" were said have waddled more than walked, there may have been little desire for them to walk too much or too far. There were very few details in the rare accounts of the Poi Dog being observed as it was either served up or as a sleeping companion.

As the dog was overfed only a paste that served to fatten it up for cooking and eating, they were not very active at all. They were said to literally hang out with the hogs, another animal that was kept to be eaten.

The Hawaiian Poi Dog was said to have been a remarkably unhealthy breed while it existed. Some state that had the dogs not been literally eaten to death, they may have died out from gross obesity, excess stupidity and an inability to eat. Due to being fed a root-based paste, the dogs were dissuaded from chewing. This led to the poor dental health and a significant loss of jawbone structure.

Other than obesity, no accounts of their possible diseases are known to exist, and the dogs were usually killed to be eaten before they died of natural causes. Their average lifespan is unknown.